Called To The Crazy

As I sit here writing and my body goes through contractions on and off, I am incredibly humbled by this process of waiting for our son to arrive. It has been a long 9 months of waiting, but honestly, I have loved being pregnant! It has been such a joy to carry this boy in my belly. Of course there were days in my first trimester when I hugged our toilet for hours that I didn't love, days during our move when I was 10 weeks pregnant that I wasn't sure I'd be able to unpack another box, and even days over the last few weeks that my body felt like it couldn't handle anymore and I just laid in our bed and cried. With all that said, God has continued to remind me what a blessing it is to be able to carry our son and we have chosen to pray for him as he grows and develops in my womb. Trevor and I have loved reading "Praying through your pregnancy" by Jennifer Polimino. The book took us through each week of pregnancy and guided us in how to pray for Landon...his brain, his skin, his vision, every inch of his being, and just as importantly his spirit; that he would know the Lord from a young age! I would highly recommend this book to any expecting couple, whether it's your first baby or your 10th! <3 

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."  

-Psalm 139:13-14

Before I got pregnant and even at the beginning of my pregnancy, people would ask me about what kind of birth I desired to have. Umm, I don't know?? My response was usually something to the effect that I'd like to avoid a c-section if at all possible, but that I know I'm not superwoman, so I'm sure I'll have an epidural or whatever I need for the pain. To be honest, I hadn't really thought much about it and I figured I would do the "norm". As Trevor and I started talking more seriously about the birth we desired for our son, I was very quickly convicted that my heart desired for the most natural birth experience possible. We both felt strongly that the Lord designed my body to birth babies and there are women who have been and are still today birthing their babies with little or no medical intervention. I promise they exist! Even though this is the direction we were drawn to, I was still incredibly nervous to say that was our "birth plan". Why is that? If I knew that was what God was putting on our hearts, why would I be fearful of "owning" that plan? I know exactly why...approval of man. Ouch! I was fearful that if I said I wanted a natural unmedicated birth and ended up taking medication during my delivery, that people would see that as a failed experience, that I couldn't "handle it" or I "gave up". But that's just it, I was more concerned with approval of man than I was with claiming the plan that we felt was best for our family. Thankfully we have a couple of good friends who have recently had a natural birth who were able to point us towards some great resources and we decided to go with the "Bradley Method". The best way I can explain this method is that it seems to be the most basic form of an unmedicated birth. It doesn't go into "set breathing", try to distract you, or hypnotize you, it simply teaches you techniques to help with relaxation during labor and focuses on husband coached childbirth. I happen to have a fabulous husband, so I knew he would be a great labor coach <3 We also have a fabulous doula who God perfectly placed in our path through mutual friends & she has been such a blessing, we are so thankful she will be there when our son is born since our family is so far away! 

As I've been preparing for labor this week, I've really tried to focus on preparing spiritually. We have spent months and months reading about the Bradley Method of birth, positions, comfort measures, etc. but I know that what I am really going to need is strength from the Lord during this labor and delivery. These are a few verses that have encouraged me and I am trying to commit to memory before our little bundle of joy decides to come out! 

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me."

 -2 Corinthians 12:9

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

-Philippians 4:6

"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast 

because they trust in you."

-Isaiah 26:3

"Cast all your anxiety on Him, for He cares for you!" 

-1 Peter 5:7

I was hesitant to share about our birth plan today not only because a part of my human self still struggles with "what if I can't do this naturally", but also because I never want to make our "plan" look any more superior or preferred than another persons desire or birth experience. For us, the key was to have God the center of our decisions about birth as well as our overall birth experience, that's it! I truly believe you can have ANY type of delivery experience and it be completely glorifying to the Lord, as long as you seek Him in making the decisions. I am thankful that I can rest assured in knowing that we did seek God in making this decision and whether we have a 100% unmedicated natural birth, I end up having an epidural and delivering vaginally, or I need a c-section, I know that we will have a redeemed childbirth experience and we will get to hold that baby boy very soon! Healthy baby & healthy mama are the goal! I am absolutely NOT superwoman and all of my closest friends know that I do not have a high pain tolerance (I'm kind of a wimp!), but I also know that God can sustain me through ANY amount of pain, suffering, worry, or fear because He created my body to do this. So in ending this post, that is our birth "plan"...to make sure we have a redeemed childbirth experience with our Redeemer as the focus! <3 We would love your prayers as we await the arrival of our Landon Scott! 

"Jesus is our deliverer in birth. He brings forth life. He chooses WHEN that baby will be born; we know no the hour, only He does. He is the one we can choose to transfer our pain to, to let Him take it and carry us. He alone rescues and delivers one from captivity. He wants His daughters to experience Him deeply in this way, consciously aware that He is in control and is the Deliverer. But we have a responsibility as well. We have to deliver or surrender our pain, our fears, our expectations, our childbirths, and ultimately our lives into the Lord. We have the ask Him to deliver us." 

- Redeeming Childbirth